Happy St. Patrick's Day!
Almost the entire day today, I thought it was the Irish's favorite holiday and even donned my black and green Boston t-shirt to celebrate. I figured it out, finally, and felt significantly bummed. And partly relieved because I understood why no one else was wearing green or sporting clovers in the spirit of St. Patrick. Anyway, that little side note is not really the point of this post.
Not that any of my posts have a point.
Regardless, I signed on today to vent. Or complain, depending on how you look at it. I am approximately two months shy of graduating from college. My plans beyond that extend as far as embarking on a 25 day trip though Europe. After that, I've got nothing.
This literally terrifies me. My stomach gets all twisted and unsettled and a tiny part of me wants to throw up. I have all these grand ideas of careers that I would love to pursue but absolutely no confidence that I am qualified for any of them. I find myself wondering if I am the only college senior experiencing this kind of self doubt.
Surely not.
I sincerely hope not, at any rate. I keep hoping something wonderful will fall into my lap. And then I remind myself that I've always believed you have to work hard to get the things you want. It's funny how I forget that sometimes.
I think right now, I'm losing the wind in my sails. My desire for a job is certainly there but my motivation and drive is strangely lacking. I need to find that fire, that sort of lightning in my veins that could make me unstoppable.
I'll let you know how that goes.
1:14am
Sometimes you don't have to work hard to get the things you want. Sometimes you work hard and then you wait. And then sometimes you dream and those dreams come true. :)
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